Sunday, December 18, 2011

Year end jitters

The last two weeks of 2011.  It’s scary how time flies.   

For some reasons, I’m actually feeling year end jitters.  Uneasy.  And I absolutely don’t like this feeling.  

It’s the feeling like you still have some unfinished business, yet you have no idea what it is… Or maybe you know, but you just are not brave enough to face it.  

A lot of things are running through my mind.  Stressed at work, stressed about mum, stressed about myself, and stressed about everything and anything.   

I think I’m getting neurotic.   

I get upset very easily, and even at the slightest thing and I tear so easily.   Though I have wanted to push the blame to “that time of the month”.    But I know it’s not.  

One bestie told me one night that I should start thinking more for myself, instead of letting all the 101 other things weigh me down that much.   She says that I worry and think too much for others, and maybe that’s why I am also starting to complain that my grey hairs are popping out.   

And guess what?  When we were about to part ways and she told me to remember to give her a call any day any time, when I just want to lash out, I just cried.  See?  That’s what I meant I’m getting neurotic.  

The jitters are really getting into me.  Such that there are days words just don’t come to me.  I can’t express myself properly and end up hemming and hawing – even when I’m with friends.  Blah…  

I really hope I will hear some good news this coming week.  At least, there will be some things off my cluttered mind.  And if it turns out good, I can welcome 2012 with gusto! 

Pray for me.  J 

1 comment:

서울라스 Souless said...

It's the last 2 weeks of 2011 my dear...