Give it up.

I’m probably going to be stoned to death by posting this article. OK, I exaggerated. But I’m sure someone out there would look at me, shake their head and go “tsk tsk tsk” after reading this, or go “Wait till you become one. Then you will know.”

Yes, maybe.

I’m talking about the gracious act of giving up your precious seat on the train to preggie women.

I’ve heard many of my girl friends who are pregnant complain that they took the train or bus and no one gave up their precious seats to them.

Some pretended to be asleep, texting on the phone, reading; basically just being kept so busy that they failed to see a woman with a large tummy standing in front of them, and calling out to them with hopeful eyes to let them sit and rest.

And then my girl friends started to complain about how rude these people are. How ungracious these people are, and that they were amazed by everyone on the seats who were oblivious to their surroundings (aka her).

But honestly, why should they?

You know you are pregnant. You know you are going to hate it standing all the way to reach your destination. You know you might most probably suffer from severe back ache or swollen legs from standing too long on the train.

I’m sure you know all these, as your tummy grows larger and heavier each day. And I’m sure you know the train is going to be crowded with no seats for you 99 per cent of the time.

And so, why do you still choose to take the train?

If you had honestly needed a seat so badly, you would have taken a cab.

You assume that because you are pregnant, you belong to the privileged group of people. You thought that people will see your tummy and understand the ache and swell you are suffering.

But honestly, do we care?

No, don’t get me wrong. I’m on the side of preggie women. I’m all for giving up seats to preggie women, especially those with a tummy double their own physique (women are amazing creatures, aren’t they?). And I would teach the younger generation to always give up seats to those who need it more than themselves.

But what I’m trying to say here is a preggie woman should also – always – show her appreciation when some kind soul gives up his or her seat to you.

Simply because it is not a must. Nor even their obligation to take care of you by giving up their seat on the bus/train to you.

Rather, it is a gracious and kind act. They choose to. Just like you choose to take the train.

I’ve personally given up seats to some preggie strangers, who took my seat without a word of thanks and acted as if I should have done that long ago. And then they proceeded to pretend to doze off almost immediately, without any point of eye contact or acknowledgement.

At that point in time, I almost felt like tapping her on the shoulder and asked her to get up and sit on the floor instead.

And also, what makes you think that you need the seat more than the chap who is dozing off at the side seat or the lady whose head is always down and keeps herself busy with her phone?

Maybe he had a really late night and honestly needed that snooze? Maybe she is suffering from a huge ready-to-explode blister from her new heels and she also could not really stand all the way?

And ask yourself, did you really always give up your seats to preggie women, back when you were not yet trotting around with a large tummy?

What’s more, the seat is public property anyway.  Just because you have a larger and firmer (kicking) tummy than him or her does not really give you the exclusive right to that seat. 

Nonetheless, giving up seats to the needy is always a gracious act. And even if that someone whom you gave up the seat to is not appreciative, your kind act will somehow, some way, transpire and add onto your own good karma.

So yes, the next time you see a preggie woman, please do give up your seat.  =)